Relay For Life and the reason I participate

My Reason to Relay

The American Cancer Society Relay For Life is more than just an event to me. It is my personal opportunity to help save lives from cancer by supporting the American Cancer Society.

My story is a personal one.  I found it ironic that the theme of Relay for Life 2010 was "more birthdays".  I lost my mother to endometrioidal and pancreatic cancer on March 20th, 2009.  That day was particularly emotional since it was also my birthday.  The night before my mom's funeral, I sat up all night and wrote a tribute to and about her.  The next day I read the words, that I had poured from my heart the night before, to the congregation.  I promised her that she would never be forgotten.

After months of mourning the loss of my mother, I decided to find a way to celebrate her life.  I wanted to find a more positive way to get through such a personal tragedy.  I then decided that my birthday could be a day of not only remembrance, but to help in the fight against cancer.  My mother was diagnosed with endometrioidal (not to be confused with endometrial) cancer about 6 years prior to her death. This is her story:

By the time my mom reached her 55th birthday, she decided to have a routine colonoscopy. Thank goodness she did or we probably wouldn't have had her as long as we did.  Cancer cells had been detected from the results of her colonoscopy.  She then underwent more than 6 hours of "exploratory" surgery (to remove any growth suspected of being cancer).  It was at this point the doctors were baffled.  They thought they would find signs of "colon cancer" during the surgery.  However they wound up finding some sort of "growth" attached to most of her organs.  They removed as much as they could then sent it off to be examined and tested.  After lab tests confirmed she had cancer, determining the type it was and the next course of action was pertinent. 

That's when mom wound up being diagnosed with endometroidal cancer.  About 5-6 years prior, she underwent a hysterectomy where endometriosis was discovered.  She was then prescribed to take high doses of hormones over the next several years.  The hormones she was prescribed is what ultimately caused her endometrial cells to become cancerous. 

After her endometrioidal cancer diagnosis, it was soon learned that she wasn't a candidate for chemo therapy.  Her cancer cells wound up fluctuating over the next 6 years and her doctors didn't feel chemo radiation therapy was necessary. My mother was prescribed medications, to treat patients with cancer (like Tamoxifen and Megace).  After about 5 1/2 years of being on those medications, her doctors felt they weren't effective anymore. They had been monitoring her cancer cells every couple months.  Sometimes it came back very low and other times it would go up again. The doctors felt that no matter if the cancer cells were high or low, the medications weren't contributing to the low counts.

Not long after they stopped her medications, her health declined rapidly.  She was eating less and less then staying in bed longer and longer.  After about 2 months of this, she got to where she couldn't even make it to the bathroom.  My dad was taking constant care of her (around the clock) while also working full-time.  He was doing his best to try and get her to eat and take her medications, change her sheets, etc.  When he couldn't be home to take care of mom, he arranged to have friends and neighbors come by the house to help.  I didn't realize she had been deteriorating that bad.  I talked to dad all the time but he didn't let on that she was getting worse until it was more than he could handle.  He said he didn't want me to worry and felt I had enough on my plate.  He finally called me when he reached the point he felt he couldn't do it on his own anymore.  I could hear the desperation in his voice and knew mom was getting worse.  I felt that I really needed to be there.  I didn't hesitate to pack up and drive 200 miles home so I could help my parents wherever I was needed.  It didn't matter to me what was going on, mom was not getting any better and this was a time where I needed to be there.  I am so thankful I had the opportunity to give back to my wonderful parents, given the grim circumstances. 

About a week or two later, dad and I had her transported to the hospital.  We didn't know what to do and letting her lay in bed all day didn't seem to be the best option.  They wound up admitting her and ran further tests.  Those tests showed that she also had developed unrelated pancreatic cancer. Even if she had had the strength to endure chemo therapy, at this point, she wasn't a candidate for it.  The treatment for the 2 types of cancer she had contradicted one another.

The last 4 months of her life took a physical and emotional toll on her. She held on as long as she could.  She never complained or even talked about her illness. She didn't want anyone to worry over her.

During the last 3 weeks of her life, I was very blessed to have been able to be mom's main caregiver.  I took care of her around the clock while she also had a wonderful Hospice Nurse and Aide who would come to the house.  Her nurse came by every couple days to monitor her comfort, medications, and symptoms.  Her Aide came by once a day to help bathe her and change her sheets. 

I am also very thankful that my mom and I had the opportunity to talk and say the things we needed to. We forgave one another for any past misgivings and spent as much time talking with one another as we could.  On the day she took her last breath of life, my dad and I were by her side.

To this day, I admire my mother's strength and faith as our family still struggles to deal with her loss.  Although some days it is still hard to deal with her no longer being with us, I am so very grateful to God for letting me have the time with her I did.  Often times we lose our loved ones and don't get the chance to say our last "I love you's" and "goodbye's".

Last year's Relay For Life walk was my first.  After mourning my mother's death for several months, I decided to try and find something I could do to help in the fight against cancer.  With every birthday of mine that passes (and anniversary of her death) I plan on raising money for, and awareness of, such a dreadful disease. It's my goal to dedicate that time in honor of my mom and to also help others in the fight for a cure. I can't wait to walk this June!  I am over half-way to reaching my goal and I am so very thankful to everyone who has donated! 

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It's sobering to think that millions of people will be diagnosed with cancer this year. Somebody close to us may be one of them.

By taking part in Relay, I am helping the American Cancer Society save lives by:

    * Helping people stay well by helping them take steps to prevent cancer or detect it early, when it?s most treatable

    * Helping people get well by being in their corner around the clock to guide them through every step of their cancer experience

    * Finding cures by funding groundbreaking research that helps us understand cancer?s causes, determine how best to prevent it and discover new ways to cure it

    * Fighting back by working with lawmakers to pass laws to defeat cancer and rally communities worldwide to join the fight

Please support my efforts by making a donation or by joining my Relay For Life team. Increase your impact by making a monthly donation.  Together, we have the power to help create a world where cancer can no longer claim another year of anyone's life.  I thank God for allowing me this opportunity to help others so we may one day find a cure.  Even the smallest donation matters and is much appreciated.  Thank you so much for your support!